I once heard my mother say, “I spend more time looking for things I have misplaced than anything else I do.” Her words stuck with me, but I didn’t understand. That problem did not apply to me! In those days, I remembered where I put things. No problema!

But, now? What’s the deal? I am continually – and I mean continually – looking for my things. The cellphone is the worst. I know what you are thinking. I need a special place where I always leave it.

At our house, we keep our land line for just two reasons; one being so that we can funnel all those weird spam calls through it and, next, so that I can call my cellphone and it will ring.

It’s getting ridiculous, my friends.

If it isn’t my phone, it’s my purse – hiding. I ask myself, “Why?” Why do I leave my purse next to my chair at the kitchen table, or on the floor at my feet in my office – or even in the car? Why can’t I always leave it in the same place?

My glasses? Well, same story. My friend Greta has umpteen pairs of reading glasses, and they are spread throughout her home. Good idea, Greta. Saves much mental anguish.

Here’s my latest goody. And it embarrasses me to tell you.

I made an appointment with a doctor months ago. In the meantime, the office administrator sent the paperwork to be filled out before the next appointment.

I filed the papers in a logical spot and, thank goodness, I didn’t misplace them.

As the date drew closer, I filled in the more recent information, like “do you have a fever, cough, etc.” I remember sticking the envelope in a zippered section of my purse.

Are we following this story? Too much information? Sorry.

The day before the appointment, I checked my purse for the envelope of papers. It was not there! Oh no. Where was it? I looked in the drawers, by the phone, next to the computer. I even searched other purses.

I called the clinic and left a message. “This is Annie. (panicky) I  misplaced the papers you sent me. I have searched everywhere. Will you re-send them to my email? Good-by.”

I was so frustrated.

Thirty minutes later my phone rang. It was her. She was grinning. I could hear it.

Annie, you sent the information a week ago. We have it already! 

That’s why the envelope was no longer in my purse. 

My efficiency is surpassing my brain’s ability to adapt.

Relief? You bet. Embarrassment? Er. Yes. But I couldn’t help but laugh at myself. Do you identify? If you do, please write to me.

And the office administrator? I couldn’t wait to meet this lady called Chris. She was so much fun. We laughed and I rolled my eyes as I shared my side of the story. Hope this “forgetfulness” gets better. 

I don’t somehow think it will.  

Judi Tabler lives in Pawnee County and is a guest columnist for the Great Bend Tribune. She can be reached at juditabler@gmail.com.