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Movie review: Disneys Christopher Robin feels more like Eeyore than Tigger
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Piglet, Pooh, Rabbit, Roo, Kanga, Tigger and Eeyore in Disneys live-action adventure Christopher Robin." - photo by Josh Terry
CHRISTOPHER ROBIN 2 stars Ewan McGregor, Hayley Atwell, Bronte Carmichael, Mark Gatiss, voice of Jim Cummings; PG (some action); in general release

Hot on the tails of last years biographical Goodbye Christopher Robin, Disney has delivered Christopher Robin, which feels much like a sister project. But in spite of a strong cast and some appropriate charm, Marc Forsters film may struggle to connect with a general audience.

Bringing to life the characters from A.A. Milnes Winnie-the-Pooh books, Christopher Robin imagines a world where the titular character is all grown up and at risk of forgetting the lessons of his youth.

A brief prologue provides a glimpse of Christopher Robin's happy childhood playing in the Hundred Acre Wood with Pooh and Co. before being sent off to boarding school, military service and, eventually, full adulthood.

We meet Christopher (Ewan McGregor) as a grown man, with a loving wife named Evelyn (Hayley Atwell) and a young daughter named Madeline (Bronte Carmichael), whos just about the same age he was when he left for school.

Christopher works as an efficiency manager for Winslow Enterprises, a struggling London luggage company. His demanding boss, Giles Winslow (Mark Gatiss), is a poster child for nepotism the kind of taskmaster who makes his employees work weekends in the name of loyalty, even if his own work ethic fails to match the same standard.

Continued long hours have put a strain on Christopher's family, and tensions come to a head when his boss forces him to skip a family trip to their Sussex cottage. Its here, as Christopher sits on a park bench trying to figure out how to cut 20 percent of his production budget, that an old friend arrives with his own problem: Pooh has lost all his friends. Reluctantly, Christopher is recruited to the cause and pulled into an adventure that eventually ties all his challenges together.

Fans of the books will be pleased to see Pooh (Jim Cummings) and a familiar cast that includes Piglet (Nick Mohammed), Rabbit (Peter Capaldi), Owl (Toby Jones) and Tigger (also voiced by Cummings). Eeyore (Brad Garrett) probably gets the most screen time aside from Pooh, and his trademark gloomy comments are frequent punchlines.

Unlike Goodbye Christopher Robin, Forsters film takes place in the imagined world of the Milne books, but both mine similar themes of balancing family relationships against the demands of career. Christopher Robin may feature playful animated animals (masterfully blended into a live-action environment), but its message, which connects Christopher's adult plight to wistful Pooh-isms such as doing nothing leads to the very best something, feels aimed at a more mature audience.

Its a good-hearted message, but it feels routine in a film that struggles to appeal to a pair of distinct audiences. As a narrative, Christopher Robin struggles to get off the ground and persists in a dreary, melancholy tone enhanced by a desaturated old-timey color palate that literally pales next to most childrens fare. At times, it feels the film has been produced exclusively from Eeyores perspective.

Things pick up considerably for an energetic third act, but at least for the kids, that may be too little too late for a film that feels most appropriate for an adult audience. In some ways, Christopher Robin might be better suited for a night out for Mom and Dad rather than a Saturday afternoon with the whole family, but its doubtful thats what Disney is hoping for.

Christopher Robin is rated PG for some action; running time: 104 minutes.
Have You Seen This? Giant 1,000 lb. bear is made of nightmare juice
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Bears are terrifying. This giant bear is a walking-living nightmare. - photo by John Clyde


NIGHTMARE LAND Many of you know that I am not a big fan of bears. I know you think they're adorable, but I promise you won't think they're so cuddly and cute when they dismember you for kicks and then use your bones as toothpicks to get your Abercrombie shirt out of their teeth.

Sorry to get graphic, I'm just very passionate about this subject and the fact that we need to prepare for the Bearpocalypse. Bears hope to be our four-legged overlords and considering their brute strength, speed, all-terrain bodies and growing intelligence, it's going to be tough to stop Bearmageddon.

I had hope that we humans were still in control of our own destiny, but then I found this video that is straight out of a nightmare and now I fear for our kind.

This video is a year old and was taken in Alaska, the scariest place on earth due to the bear to human ratio. They call this bear 747 because he's the size of a passenger jet and if he decides to crash with you aboard there will be no survivors.

I know you're thinking 747 is a big cuddly mammal and when he scratches his back on that tree your eyes get all starry and your mouth starts making that, "ahhh" shape. Resist it. Fight it. Survive. 747 is using the tree to limber up to make sure he is poised and ready to take you down if you get a little too close.

Apparently, it's possible to take a bear tour to see 747 and others like him, and you can if that's your prerogative. People like to do stuff like that. Some people also like to hunt ghosts and perform seances because who doesn't want to live in an actual nightmare?

Please stay away from 747 and prepare yourself for the Bearpocalypse.